Hello my Dear Void. Its me. I havent been here talking with you for months. I have thought about it alot from time to time again, yet not making enough effort to actually come and say hello.
I dont know if I can ever say that Im fully settled down. Life is full of twists and turns. Last time we saw I told you an exciting story about moving and starting my life in happiness. Im back in the same point in my life, with some major differences though. Im sitting on the pile of my bags in a small room that I somehow have to call home. Im alone and definately not excited. Im heartbroken.
Truth to be told, and Im not scared to say it out loud, Im miserable and I cant stop the tears, I simply cant. But to all the people outside, Im the same happy-go-lucky girl. I cant remember the time when I changed into this person who is so private about her emotions, that not an inch of her pain and suffering is allowed to shine through. When I step outside Im a big pretender, acting like everything is fine but feeling my heart crumbling into pieces inside. Why did I ever allow this to happen?
Im hurting. And not because of anything I did. I feel Im getting to old for this, to start from zero again.
Im hurting.
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