Stuck in the middle with you.

My Dear Void, I am. I feel stuck in the middle.
Do you know the feeling when you are completely thrown off your game and don't know how to take it. And the person doing the throwing seems to think, 10 minutes later, than its all good. Equilibrium restored and that's that.
I, personally, don't know how to react to that. I'm completely dumbfounded. Even days later I don't know whether I should bring it up if asked if I am ok. It's one of those moments as if you are looking at yourself from afar and you see yourself nodding and your lips moving, saying that you are fine because you don't know any other way to be without starting an argument or a fight.
Inside I know, and seeing myself from afar I know that I am not fine. How do I let it be known that I'm not fine.
It might be easy to say that just say it out. I AM NOT FINE.
Its not easy. Especially when I have no idea how to go back to being fine again. I can't go forward how I want and I can't go backwards without being afraid of the high price I might have to pay.